I Have Arrived

Daddy and James arrived in Kelowna after a very long flight from Africa on May 4, 2007. A couple of weeks later I shared my thoughts on paper:


Sunday, May 19, 2007

James, you are home, laying asleep beside me in our bed. It is an honor, a joy and a blessing to have you. You arrived with apprehension, week and malnourished. Today, two weeks later, you are vibrant, happy and loving to eat. You are calling us mommy and daddy and we are in love and bonded to you. Your kindness, humor and soft and gentle ways are what keeps us feeling over the moon. My life is complete.

Thank you, thank you God for blessing us with our precious two sons. Continue, God to guide us to be the parents we need to be for our sons.

love and joy,
Looking back at my journal brings back a flood of memories. I've tried to type them out but the keyboard and I are not flowing tonight. I've deleted. Re-typed. Cut and pasted. Still I was not satisfied how the words read. Maybe it's just not meant to be written about, this time around. I'll respect that and in the meantime, to the two people who have shared with me, just recently, that they are adopting internationally I will keep sending positive vibes your way. All the best in your adoption journeys.

The Story of My Adoption

I was born in Africa on February 8, 2005. When people tell me they know of Liberia, the country where I was born, I get quite excited. There are fifty-three countries in Africa, I only know of one!

For the first nine months of my life I lived in an old zinc house in an area highly populated with drug and crime activities. The police are afraid to go into this area, since it is run by criminals.

The sanitary conditions were very poor. My house was infested with flies and mosquitoes. Perhaps this is way I have a melt down if either a fly or a mosquito comes flying by me. Don't let me get started on my phobia about dogs....

The neighborhood was deplorable, dirty and crowded. The beach was, and probably still is, being used for latrine purposes. There is no educational, social nor adequate facility for little tykes like me.

I arrived at the West African Children Support Network (WACSN) at nine months old. At the orphanage I ate the same thing everyday: oatmeal for breakfast, rice for lunch and bread with tea for dinner. It was a lot more than I was used to but still my body craved for more. This is why I ate non-stop for a whole year when I arrived, gaining a whopping 20lbs in less than a year! You will notice that this is why I eat with such precision, quite unlike my little brother. He spills everything!

I slept on a single bed size mattress on the floor, sometimes sharing it with other boys if the orphanage got crowded. I spent my day singing, and memorizing my ABC's. There were no toys. It took me no time at all to learn about super heroes, trucks, and cars. Disney, and the other toy makers have the power of marketing down pat, no matter how hard my parents have tried to shield me from these consumerism gurus.

The nannies where loving and caring. Though I do have to stay that since living in Canada I am sure smitten by blonds. I love to touch their hair. You can just ask a couple of girl blond buddies!

When I met my dad for the first time, I just clung to him. I didn't want to see or hear anything else but him. I was afraid, sick and hungry. Having him hold me made me feel safe and happy. Slowly I looked at my mom and my little brother. It took me awhile to start talking. I was often found humming and singing songs. Especially the song, "Hosanna".

After two weeks I started talking a lot and my parents say I haven't stopped since. I love entertaining. I can sing you 3 of Kid Rocks' songs, word for word and I have also incorporated some of my own dance moves. The words in his song Amen, "can you imagine what's it's like to starve to death...." reminds me of the stats in Liberia: nearly half the children die before they are five years old.

If you ask me, "James, where is the sun going?" as the sun sets I will tell you it's going to Liberia.

If you ask me what I did in Africa I tell you, "I was a little baby and hungry and I cried." And then I'll pretend to cry like a baby. As funny as I think I am, my parents often tell me, "James, calm down. Use your soft voice."

I know that my daddy and mommy waited and wondered, but they tell me, never did they imagine I would be so cute and they would love me so much, even when I can't sit still to take a picture!

Note: Any words that are highlighted are links to past posts.

Wordless Wednesday

Act of courage

There is no guarantee that a speaker is actually good at it. And it's so annoying to listen to one who isn't. I, being raised catholic, have listened to priests who could make me fall asleep at the first sight of them walking to the podium to say their sermon. I had teachers who had the same power of me. I swear I slept through every grade 12 chemistry class.

And then there are those wanna-be-good speakers that try too hard. They are the Tony Robbins of the world. They use their hands, walk around, their voices go up and down trying to keep the listeners awake and entertained. This is when I need to use the restroom. I take the longest route and take another 15 minutes strolling around before I get back to my seat.

Last week Daddy and I attended a lecture given by Dr. James Orbinski. I had never heard of the guy. But reading an article in the paper about him I decided that we should attend. To ensure I didn't get disappointed I gave myself an internal talking to: "Even if he is a bad speaker focus on the words and the meaning of what he is saying. Don't focus on the delivery." I repeated this to myself like it was a mantra. All for nothing. Dr. Orbinski, was not flashy. He delivered his message with heart and possessed a soft compassion about him. I didn't even have try to focus; it came naturally to want to listen to him.

As the past president of Médecins Sans Frontières (Doctors Without Borders) Dr. Orbinski has seen disturbing stuff. I was honored to be in his presence. To meet someone who not only has seen the horrors in Rwanda, Sudan, Afghanistan, and many other locations but has taken an on hands role in tending to the thousands of people affected by these atrocities was humbling.

During the Q&A period someone asked, "What can we do?" Dr. Orbinski answered, "Donating, signing those online petitions are not enough. You have to join a group in your community, participate in something that you have a passion for. You need to do more. Refuse to accept the unacceptable."

I jotted down a few other things he said on my pink wrinkled little notepad that I carry in my purse for the boys to scribble on as entertainment...I knew it would come in handy for me one day.

• ...political responsibility....imperfect outcomes
• alternatives are possible if we choose to see it
• indifference...silence...forgetting

We purchased his book at this event and I was the first in line to have him sign it! He asked, "Who do I make it out to?" I said proudly, "To James, our son that we adopted from Liberia."

I'm taking a small step. I am completing a volunteer application for our local women's shelter. Though my true goal is be an aid worker in a third world country. This lecture sealed the deal in my heart that indeed I'll be doing that one day. When? I can't say for sure. But I will. You can bet on it.












For James - with great hope - James Orbinski